Good: Your son studies a lot in his room Bad: You find
several porn movies hidden there Ugly: You're in them
Good: Your husband understands fashion Bad: He's a cross
dresser Ugly: He looks better than you
Good: Your son's finally maturing Bad: He's involved with
the woman next door Ugly: So are you
Good: You give the birds and bees talk to yourdaughter Bad
She keeps interrupting Ugly: With corrections
Good: Your wife's not talking to you Bad: She wants a
divorce Ugly: She's a lawyer
Good: The postman's early Bad: He's wearing fatigues and
carrying an AK47 Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas