Winner:

There once was a gal named Lewinsky Who played on a flute like Stravinsky 'Twas "Hail to the Chief"

On this flute made of beef That stole the front page from Kaczynski.

First runner up:

Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky We don't want to leave clues like Kaczynski,

Since you look such a mess,

Use the hem of your dress And wipe that stuff off of your chinsky.

Second runner up:

Lewinsky and Clinton have shown What Kaczynski must surely have known:

That an intern is better Than a bomb in a letter Given the choice of how to be blown.

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